All you need is love

Habili-blog 8/31/18
“All you need is love”
by Jared Mayes

Get ready to squirm everybody because I’m going to talk about one of the two things they tell you not to talk about at the dinner table. Religion. Put down the pitchforks people, I would never purposely offend someone or degrade their beliefs. I don’t care if you worship one God, seven Gods, or a bowl of spaghetti. Everyone is entitled to define their beliefs into whatever tangible or intangible person place or thing that they so choose.

What I would like to talk about is the pressure and stigma that recovery is in anyway related to the belief and practice of a particular religion. I’m here to bust that myth. How do I know? Because my atheist friends aren’t any less sober than my friends who are active in a religion. I have seen and heard so many of the same stories from individuals who are incarcerated or homeless who have decidedly seen the light and turned their life over to said light only to quickly forget that vow once they have gotten to a point of stability.

Religion should not be called upon only in time of need.

For that reason I believe that it should be taken out of the equation of rehab + religion = sobriety. A person first and foremost has to learn to believe in themselves and define a clear picture of what they want and where they want to go. Any outside factors beyond that produce clouded views and unrealistic expectations. This all occurs when a lost individual clings onto a new set of morals and teachings that they don’t necessarily grasp and then when they inevitably find a reason to question their newfound beliefs, the foundation which they built on ultimately crumbles.

What about those who get sober and already have a strong upbringing within a certain religion? Am I telling you that I think the best way to get sober is to denounce your faith? OF COURSE NOT! If you have an understanding of your faith, then by all means incorporate that into your plan for success. This blog is intended for those who are reaching and scratching trying to find something to hold onto and immerse themselves into the first thing that helps them catch their balance. There is such a pressure in the recovery world to define what it is that can be considered your almighty Higher Power that people often just choose whatever the guy next to them in the mothball scented room of the church with the lukewarm coffee believes.

Now here’s a little personal belief that may resonate for some. When I sit down and think about what it is that I can look to in search of answers, I look at nature. Can you swim out into the ocean during a hurricane and not see the undertow as something more powerful and mighty than yourself? Can you stand on the top of a mountain, looking out at the sunrise with the wind softly brushing your skin and think you could make anything half as glorious? That’s all I need to define to know that there is something bigger than me out there.

Nature is my religion.

My morals and principles are based off of love and trusting that if I do good things then in turn I should expect good results. I pray not to anything specific, but I send out well-wishes and good vibes to those in need. For anyone struggling with religion early on in their recovery, just know that there shouldn’t be a pressure to commit yourself to a belief system in a certain time frame. It’s all about faith and care for one another. In the words of the Beatles, “All you need is love”